I have a few important updates.
This weekend at UM, the ACC kicked off its track and field championship tournament. Competition began on Thursday with a few preliminary qualifying rounds, which meant that today (Friday) had some hot semifinal races as well as the finals of some field events. After class I managed to make it over to the track to see the men’s high jump final and the men’s and women’s 1500m. Then I watched UM hurdlers Nelm (Junior, reigning 60m hurdle champ) and Hill qualify for the finals on Saturday. As a runner, ex-high jumper and all around fan of track and field, I’ll be very excited to see the hot heats in tomorrow’s finals. Both of our teams, men’s and women’s, have the firepower to do some spectacular stuff. Oh yeah, and I almost forgot to mention, admission is free!
Probably more pressing than ACC track and field is the recent declaration of UM as the #1 Party School, as judged by the undoubtedly rigorous analysts at Playboy magazine. The funny thing is, that not only do we rank number one, we do so with the highest score in the “Brains” category – alright, maybe it’s funnier that party schools are ranked with considerations made for intelligence… Your call! Regardless, we trump all other schools in the top ten in this category as well as the “Bikini” category, which I suppose is equivalent to “hotness.” If you want an explanation of the ranking system, you can google “playboy and party school” but in the interest of professional responsibility I can’t give you a direct link. I can link you to CNN though: article
It’s hard to follow partying and Playboy, but I still have to tell you that the Ying Yang Twins will be performing live on campus tonight. I don’t know how I feel about this personally, but I seem to remember a time when they were popular. So if the fact that UM's Hurricane Productions got them to show up and play melts your butter, more power to you. Actually, I’ve never seen a rap show by anyone other than N.E.R.D and Common, so I may go check it out. Plus a local jam band compiled of Frost music school drop-outs is opening. Maybe it’ll turn out to be a night to remember…
Have a great weekend!
Friday, April 17, 2009
Sunday, April 12, 2009
Guys n' Dolls
Incoming freshman have lots of concerns about their new school. You want the skinny on loads of things: the real story of academics, housing, professors, the campus, the adjacent area, sports teams, clubs, places to eat etc. And everything in that list will ultimately come to define your eventual college experience so it’s pretty important to know what you’ll be getting yourself into. But probably the most important factor beyond all of those things and that which will most immediately affect your emergent college social life is the composition of the student body …
…or more precisely, the student’s bodies. Yep. That’s right. You have definitely speculated at one point or another on the “aesthetic” make-up of Miami’s student body. And there’s nothing wrong with that. You’re going to be here for four long years and you better know whether the school has lookers falling off the shelves like soup cans at an overstocked grocer’s, or if it’s drier than Death Valley in the screaming heat of summer. So what follows is a something of a scouting report on the boys and girls of U Miami. Obviously I’m not the unshakable authority on this stuff, so my analysis might lean slightly in the direction of my own personal taste. But I’ll do my best to be fair. Oh and in case you have any doubts as to my credibility or the ability of an engineering major to properly analyze such a subject I just wanted to let you know you’re wayyyyyy off. We engineers pull loads of all-nighters and always use friction to our advantage.
* * * * *
Girls: the rumors in this case are all spot on. The U definitely represents. The number of hotties per capita here easily trumps that of any other college in America except for maybe a few So Cal rivals, and I’d like to think we could even give them a tough run for their honeys. Really though, there are lots of beautiful girls here, regardless of your take on “beauty.”
The fact that Miami is an international city means the U attracts a large international student population. As a result, there is a big Latin presence on campus and quite a number of European nationalities have representation. A word to the wise though, these foreigners seem to come with a bit more attitude – either that or they’re just less impressed by typical American men and their weak pickup lines. But Miami is also a subtropical playground. Because of this, you’re bound to run into many spacey, careless girls running around with daddy’s credit card. Which I guess leads me to my larger point. Whether foreign or domestic the U doesn’t lack pretty faces, but the abundance of looks can occasionally make for a slight scarcity of personality. A general sentiment of entitlement seems to run through these most “sought-after” groups. So if that’s your type of girl, you’ll invariably find yourself spending lots of your money to take her out to South Beach every weekend – that is if she judges you worthy of spending your money on her.
Okay, so now onto the boys. While the girls seem to get all of the attention there are lots of hot guys on campus too (or so I’m told…). But if I had to give an overarching generalization of the type of guys on campus that Miami is most remembered for, I’d use the words “gym body.” There are certainly good looking guys on campus but a large majority of them must compensate for their general lack of emotional and social integrity by lifting really heavy things according to a scientifically defined schedule. In short, there are lots of “bros”: lacrosse playing, football watching, flashy and frat-esque. You’ll know them by their conversational use of the word “bro” and they’ll be chasing after the scantily clad, highly inebriated girls of South Beach.
The international boys are very popular but typically just as vain, yet vain in a way that seems to suggest they will one day be part of the structure upholding society. I mean, they too run around with dad’s credit card, but do so with more sophistication. My roommate this year is the son of French plutocrats. He’s a biomedical engineer with a 3.8 GPA, dresses in Paul & Joe, and has a good knowledge of world affairs: quite a contrast to the bro who majors in business, wears shorts and sleeveless Miami t-shirts, and doesn’t have a good knowledge of really anything except market prices for creatine. So maybe the international boys are a step up in that they might actually be worth talking to from time to time, but they’ll still like to party.
Ladies please don’t get me wrong. It’s not as though there aren’t any boys at U Miami worth your time. There are a great many tall-dark-handsome types, with solid manners and real depth. If the two preceding paragraphs seem harsh, it’s because I consider them warnings. I’m trying to paint an honest picture and it’s much easier to generalize the bad than it is to generalize the good. There are artsy kids, indie boys, musicians galore (thanks to the Frost School of Music), and all types in the middle. So long as you’re willing to look around a bit, you will certainly find overwhelming exceptions, but these typically aren’t the ones most propagated by the lore of Suntan U.
Final words on the boy/girl scene: Miami has amazingly beautiful students, but as always, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
…or more precisely, the student’s bodies. Yep. That’s right. You have definitely speculated at one point or another on the “aesthetic” make-up of Miami’s student body. And there’s nothing wrong with that. You’re going to be here for four long years and you better know whether the school has lookers falling off the shelves like soup cans at an overstocked grocer’s, or if it’s drier than Death Valley in the screaming heat of summer. So what follows is a something of a scouting report on the boys and girls of U Miami. Obviously I’m not the unshakable authority on this stuff, so my analysis might lean slightly in the direction of my own personal taste. But I’ll do my best to be fair. Oh and in case you have any doubts as to my credibility or the ability of an engineering major to properly analyze such a subject I just wanted to let you know you’re wayyyyyy off. We engineers pull loads of all-nighters and always use friction to our advantage.
* * * * *
Girls: the rumors in this case are all spot on. The U definitely represents. The number of hotties per capita here easily trumps that of any other college in America except for maybe a few So Cal rivals, and I’d like to think we could even give them a tough run for their honeys. Really though, there are lots of beautiful girls here, regardless of your take on “beauty.”
The fact that Miami is an international city means the U attracts a large international student population. As a result, there is a big Latin presence on campus and quite a number of European nationalities have representation. A word to the wise though, these foreigners seem to come with a bit more attitude – either that or they’re just less impressed by typical American men and their weak pickup lines. But Miami is also a subtropical playground. Because of this, you’re bound to run into many spacey, careless girls running around with daddy’s credit card. Which I guess leads me to my larger point. Whether foreign or domestic the U doesn’t lack pretty faces, but the abundance of looks can occasionally make for a slight scarcity of personality. A general sentiment of entitlement seems to run through these most “sought-after” groups. So if that’s your type of girl, you’ll invariably find yourself spending lots of your money to take her out to South Beach every weekend – that is if she judges you worthy of spending your money on her.
Okay, so now onto the boys. While the girls seem to get all of the attention there are lots of hot guys on campus too (or so I’m told…). But if I had to give an overarching generalization of the type of guys on campus that Miami is most remembered for, I’d use the words “gym body.” There are certainly good looking guys on campus but a large majority of them must compensate for their general lack of emotional and social integrity by lifting really heavy things according to a scientifically defined schedule. In short, there are lots of “bros”: lacrosse playing, football watching, flashy and frat-esque. You’ll know them by their conversational use of the word “bro” and they’ll be chasing after the scantily clad, highly inebriated girls of South Beach.
The international boys are very popular but typically just as vain, yet vain in a way that seems to suggest they will one day be part of the structure upholding society. I mean, they too run around with dad’s credit card, but do so with more sophistication. My roommate this year is the son of French plutocrats. He’s a biomedical engineer with a 3.8 GPA, dresses in Paul & Joe, and has a good knowledge of world affairs: quite a contrast to the bro who majors in business, wears shorts and sleeveless Miami t-shirts, and doesn’t have a good knowledge of really anything except market prices for creatine. So maybe the international boys are a step up in that they might actually be worth talking to from time to time, but they’ll still like to party.
Ladies please don’t get me wrong. It’s not as though there aren’t any boys at U Miami worth your time. There are a great many tall-dark-handsome types, with solid manners and real depth. If the two preceding paragraphs seem harsh, it’s because I consider them warnings. I’m trying to paint an honest picture and it’s much easier to generalize the bad than it is to generalize the good. There are artsy kids, indie boys, musicians galore (thanks to the Frost School of Music), and all types in the middle. So long as you’re willing to look around a bit, you will certainly find overwhelming exceptions, but these typically aren’t the ones most propagated by the lore of Suntan U.
Final words on the boy/girl scene: Miami has amazingly beautiful students, but as always, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
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